2004 Audi A6 Quattro 2.7T S LINE SPORT rare sedan NO RESERVE

OK, let me start off by saying this Audi A6 is only available forpurchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it waspossible for a vehicle to sprout chest hair and a five o’clock shadow,this Audi would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.
It was never intended to drive to the mall so you can pick up thatadorable shirt at Abercrombie & Fitch that you had your eye on. Itwasn’t meant to transport you to yoga class or Bed Bath and Beyond. No,that’s what your Prius is for. If that’s the kind of car you’re lookingfor, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. It is BEAUTIFUL, but has a few blemishes. So ifyou can’t handle being seen behind the wheel of this biblical, firebreathing, dragon slaying hero because it has a few purplehearts, move on.
This sedan was engineered by 3rd degree ninja pirate super-warriorsin the highest mountains of Germany to serve the needs of the man thatcheats death on a daily basis. They didn’t even consider superfluousnancy boy amenities like navigation systems (real men don’t get lost), Bluetooth (a real man doesn’t let anything blue on his tooth), orOn Star (real men don’t even know what On Star is).
No, this brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled superaction junkies need. It has a 265 HP engine to outrun the cops and a 5speed automatic transmission so you know grandma wont be taking off with it whenyour not looking. It’s saved my bacon more than once. It’s got specialblood/gore resistant upholstery. It doesn't even have a first-aid kit in theback. You know what the first aid kit would really need in it? A pint of whiskey, astitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on whenyou’re operating on yourself.
I am starting this auction at $200 with NO RESERVE. If you want to end this auction early, my price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $5500. But I’llentertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don’t walk up andtell me you’ll give me $500 for it. That’s liable to earn you aBurmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingeredeye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let’s just say you won’t be theprettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore.
There’s only 143,205 mile's on this all-wheel drive hellcat from PlanetKickass. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that willcarry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.
Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it’s arugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stuntdouble, then buy this car. I might be out hang-gliding or BASEjumping or just chilling with my lady, but leave a message and I’ll getback to you. And when I do, we’ll talk about a price over a nice glassof Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash.
It passed its last dealership safety inspection with flying colors but is being sold as-is.

Also published at eBay.com